10 Tell-Tale Signs You’re a Grownup

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  1. You take your coffee black. You actually have to hold back a chuckle when you hear, “Want room for cream?” Do I want room for cream? Ha. Sorry, Trix, but cream is for kids. I’m a grownup now. I’d like nothing more than a rich, steaming cup of French-pressed, battery-acid-blend-with-notes-of-mud joe without that cream and sugar swill YOU call a latte. Pssh.
  2. Things you called “burnt” as a child, you now call “crispy.” The looks of horror you gave your father as he scraped off the indistinguishable black bits off the baking sheet while murmuring, “Mmm, that’s where all the flavor is,” are the same looks your kids are giving you. The same goes for “crispy” toast. Like it? Congrats! You’re officially a grownup.
  3. You saw an eight-year-old driving a car with his mom. Seriously. You have uttered the words, “He can’t be fifteen. He looks so young!” Fifteen-year-olds have always looked like that, it’s just that now you are old.
  4. You use the words, “classic” and “timeless.” Classic and timeless are words that make you feel good about the fact that you like old things: leather-bound books, the smell of rich mahogany, little black dresses with pearls, iron skillets, expensive scotch, etc.
  5. You wear flat shoes. When you’re an adult, you start looking for support and quality, and then buy multiple pairs in classic colors like black, brown, and sometimes navy. Occasionally, you will venture out in heels, but only when you’re going to be out for a couple hours. Your old, tired dogs just can’t stand the heels anymore for a night out.
  6. You don’t stay out all night anymore. What is this going to bed at 3 a.m. nonsense? You have to wake up before 6 a.m. to get that roast in the crockpot, so that means going to bed at 10 at the latest.
  7. You try to Skype with your nephew/niece/child/grandkid and struggle because you can’t figure out how to use it, while he/she sits there staring at you in bewilderment.
  8. You turn off the GPS or Google maps because her voice is annoying and you look at the actual map instead. You gloat inside when you make it to your destination all by yourself.
  9. You buy things in bulk. You bought a chest freezer for the side of beef you split, and have an extra room in the house devoted to massive amounts of toilet paper, paper towels, and Swiffer refills.
  10. You start really loving people. You’ve experienced enough loss by now to appreciate your family and friends a little more. You call, send a card, and visit face to face. You connect.
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The Primal Blueprint 21-Day Challenge

First of all, thank you for supporting my sister’s Strong Body Whole Heart campaign. Kelly and Maggie met their goal of $2000 last night! Yay! They are super excited to start recording their podcast and I’m dying to listen. I’ll post the link here as soon as it’s available.

The next thing I’d like to mention is The Primal Blueprint 21-Day Challenge. I made a post last year about how switching to this way of eating and living has changed my life. Now is your chance to try it out! Take the challenge; I’m certain you will never look back. 🙂

The Primal Blueprint 21-Day Challenge
Learn more at Mark’s Daily Apple.

Duck, Duck,…Foie Gras!

By the beard of Zeus! It has been a while since I’ve posted. Well, when in Rome…or Ireland…

Actually, this summer has been so entirely wonderful and stressful that blogging has taken the backseat while my awesome life called shotgun.  Here’s a quick summary: I traveled to Milwaukee, Chicago, and Ireland; this cool guy Tony spent the past eight weeks here with me (which included adventures every weekend); I’m applying to grad school so I studied for the GRE every waking moment; and well,…hey. I can see you shaking your head. I realize that condensed version doesn’t seem like much. Ok, fine. I’m behind. Here goes. Let’s review THE LIST. My exciting life list! Yay!

  • white water rafting
  • zip lining
  • paddle boarding
  • be a model for a day
  • take a bubble bath in a clawfoot tub
  • eat caviar
  • eat foie gras
  • write a book
  • write my initials in wet cement
  • ride a gondola in Italy
  • ride in a hot air balloon
  • stand underneath a waterfall
  • slow dance with someone I love

As you see, the “eat foie gras” line item has been crossed through. Sort of like my movie conquest earlier this year, each thing on MY LIST isn’t something I expect to enjoy. It’s just on there for the experience. It’s just there to know I’ve done it. But nine times out of 10 I end up loving it. So, I will describe what eating foie gras was like. By the way, it’s pronounced like this: fwah grah. It makes me feel fancy to just say it.

Imagine butter for a second. If I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter popped into your head, please, just stop. No. Country Crock doesn’t count either. C’mon, get real. BUTTER. Real-preferably pastured-butter is pretty much the most amazing food aside from bacon. If you say you don’t like butter, just stop trying to fake it because everyone knows you’re lying. It is impossible to not like butter.

Butter, softened, has the texture of pure magic. It is smooth, but not loose, and glides onto your tongue like the best kiss of your life. It can be romantic if you let it.

Ok, now that you’re considering going to the fridge and taking a little lick of your butter (butter-haters, I know you have some in there), let’s get back to foie gras. So, there you go; foie gras is just soft, spreadable chicken-flavored butter magic.

If it weren’t for the lucky bastards like Anthony Bourdain, Andrew Zimmern, and whoever else travels around the world like a total badass, eating all sorts of magical, buttery things, I probably wouldn’t have even thought about foie gras. I’m pretty sure there was an episode once where Anthony ate a hot dog topped with foie gras and his eyes rolled back like he was going to die right there-and die happy.

In all truth, I have a serious crush on Anthony Bourdain, so not to outdo him or anything, but my first time eating foie gras was in a castle in Ireland. That’s right, I stayed in a castle and ate fancy foods like a total traveling badass. Here’s a picture.

photo

There it is, on the top left of the plate. Remember what I said about butter? Now, see the bread? Yep. That happened.

Foie gras. Check.

Diet Rewind: Go with Your Gut

I’ve been hovering over the idea of eating Paleo-style for about a year now, and I finally landed a few weeks ago.  I can’t explain why I haven’t up to this point, except for the unspoken feeling that I would be giving up so many of the foods I love.

For those who are unsure what Paleo-style eating is, you can check out the basics here.  There are a few different varieties of the diet, but the basic concepts are the same, so I’ve been using balance and good sense to figure out what works best for me.

So far, I think it’s wonderful.  My goal is not to lose weight, so after I lost a few pounds the first week, I had to adjust a little to get back on the maintaining train.  That means I simply had to incorporate more calories and fat.

The biggest reason I wanted to post about this is because I didn’t realize how generally-upset my stomach was until these past few weeks.  When eating lots of fruits and veggies, along with good fat and good meat, I never feel bloated, gassy, or nauseated.  It makes every morning more regular, too, if you know what I mean.  Also, cutting out refined and added sugar makes everything taste a little better, ironically.

If I had to rhyme how I feel, I would say I feel lighter and tighter.  In my old ways, I frequently would feel like I was carrying around a heavy lump in my stomach after a regular meal.  I would get heartburn and it seemed like it took me days to digest some of that stuff.  Now, I feel clean and light inside, like everything is working the way it should and moving around at the right pace.

I feel tighter in that I don’t feel bloated and pudgy.  I get excited for exercise because I know the results will shine through.

My oily skin hasn’t broken out in three weeks and my teeth look whiter.  I feel stronger and have more energy.  I’ve come to realize how much I was actually missing out on.

I’ll be honest and say it has taken a LOT of discipline and self control.  I’ve caved a few times.  The sugar cravings were the first hurdle, but that really wasn’t terrible; eating up in-season fruit really helped.  The biggest hurdle for me was resisting fried things.  The other day I wanted a doughnut so badly.  I was just craving some fried dough!

I have one “cheat night” a week.  I have dinner with a couple neighbors on Thursdays and rarely do our menus not include some pasta, tortillas, bread, and cheese of some kind.  Oh! I almost forgot to mention dessert.  We have some killer desserts.  Last night, for instance, we had ice cream sandwich cake: ice cream sandwiches covered with Cool Whip and sprinkled Butterfinger crumbs on top.  The single bite I had was divine.

However, since my neighbors now know about my new style of eating, I’m hoping we can incorporate more of the core Paleo values as the weeks go on.  I know it might not happen right away, and I’m ok with that.  Having great friends to laugh with is definitely worth it.

I thought this would fit well on my bucket list blog, not only because I mentioned it in this post, but because my whole idea behind eating Paleo-style is to be the healthiest, happiest version of myself, and that version of myself is destined to check everything off the list.  So often I hear the phrase, “Go with your gut,” and I’m telling you, my Paleo-style gut is happy!  Who can argue that?!

It might not work for everyone, and there are areas where I’ve found I need a little give-and-take, like having a piece of dark chocolate every now and then.  J  In our modern world, it’s hard to eat “perfectly,” but setting high goals at least gets you somewhere.  If you’ve considered taking the next step in your diet, maybe this post is for you.  Maybe it’s something you could try and end up enjoying as much as I do.

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